So it's election night in Ontario, and the evidence is everywhere in my household, with newspapers and magazines strewn about (I'll get to picking them up very soon). As always, I'll soon head out to spend the night helping out in the newsroom, but this morning, as I look over the Citizen and the Globe, a funny anecdote comes to mind.
It was the night of the leaders' debate, which had just begun playing on the living room TV while I chased my 10-month old around (it took about three hours for me to finish watching that hour and a half-long debate!), and my 13-year-old son relaxed on the loveseat, playing his Nintendo DS.
As Dalton McGuinty began to speak, without even looking up from his video game, my son blurted out, "Is that the tax man?" I began to roar with laughter.
Whether it speaks to the stickiness of the NDP/PC's anti-McGuinty messages, or simply the effectiveness of attack ads, it really was hilarious, and it helped open up a good chat about where the "tax man" moniker came from.
Parents, do you talk about politics with your kids? Are you engaged in this Ontario election? I'd love to hear from you: editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca
Thursday, October 6, 2011
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Supermom? Not really
My apologies, dear readers--if you're still around.
I would understand completely if you've lost patience and given up on this blog. This has been a tremendously hectic fall season, with my newsroom job, teaching two college courses, putting the finishing touches on the winter issue of Ottawa Parenting Times (out in early December!) and continuing to freelance for various publications.
As per the cliche, I truly feel the weight of the world on my shoulders. I am well aware that I tend to, as do so many women and mothers, take on more and more work, even when it becomes increasingly (and evidently) impossible, hesitating to say "no" to any project, for fear no more offers will come.
It's a constant fight for working moms, struggling not to lose your professional identity and the constant dread of only being seen, and valued, as "mom." Eventually, you push yourself to the point I'm at now--feeling that I'm doing too much and doing none of it well.
It's been well documented that women strive to "have it all." But can you have it all, and be all things to everyone in your life, and keep your sanity? Right now, I'm inclined to give an emphatic "no."
Further to this, I came across two interesting pieces in the Globe & Mail today; one on how chronic stress can make mothers hostile and insensitive, and another on alcohol as Mom's stress relieving secret, evoking a bit of guilt about those occasional and treasured glasses of wine.
What do you think, working parents? How do you maintain balance in your life? And how do you cope with the constant stresses of juggling parenting and work? editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca
I would understand completely if you've lost patience and given up on this blog. This has been a tremendously hectic fall season, with my newsroom job, teaching two college courses, putting the finishing touches on the winter issue of Ottawa Parenting Times (out in early December!) and continuing to freelance for various publications.
As per the cliche, I truly feel the weight of the world on my shoulders. I am well aware that I tend to, as do so many women and mothers, take on more and more work, even when it becomes increasingly (and evidently) impossible, hesitating to say "no" to any project, for fear no more offers will come.
It's a constant fight for working moms, struggling not to lose your professional identity and the constant dread of only being seen, and valued, as "mom." Eventually, you push yourself to the point I'm at now--feeling that I'm doing too much and doing none of it well.
It's been well documented that women strive to "have it all." But can you have it all, and be all things to everyone in your life, and keep your sanity? Right now, I'm inclined to give an emphatic "no."
Further to this, I came across two interesting pieces in the Globe & Mail today; one on how chronic stress can make mothers hostile and insensitive, and another on alcohol as Mom's stress relieving secret, evoking a bit of guilt about those occasional and treasured glasses of wine.
What do you think, working parents? How do you maintain balance in your life? And how do you cope with the constant stresses of juggling parenting and work? editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca
Friday, August 26, 2011
A family farewell to Jack
On Wednesday night, I brought my 13-year-old son to Parliament Hill to pay our respects to the late Jack Layton. He had asked me to take him, something I found remarkable.
Over the years, he has shown some interest in politics and the key players. Like so many of us, he enjoyed Jack's sunny disposition, his honest and hardworking nature and even the feistiness that emerged during leaders' debates and at other times.
The public viewing was a historical moment, and he knew that and wanted to be part of it. Moreover, he wanted to thank Jack for his work and his fight for families.
And so we did, waiting an hour and a half in line outside until we finally entered the foyer of the House of Commons. He was intrigued to see the place where so much of the work of Canada's politicians is done. In the condolence book, I watched as he very carefully printed, without any coaching, "Thank you Jack, for your amazing work as the leader of the NDP."
As we approached the casket, and bowed our heads to say goodbye to someone we'd never met, but admired, I saw his eyes moisten with sadness. It seemed the realization of life's fragility had dawned on him, for the first time. He has never experienced the death of a loved one or attended a public viewing or funeral service. This was an important moment for many reasons, and I was glad we had come.
As for the lengthy wait in line, we spent the time just chatting. I loved the quality time. And then the questions came: he wanted to know how party candidates were chosen and how they came to represent their constituents, and how members could rise to the top to represent their parties. I tried to explain all of this, but I don't know how well I did.
Absorbing it all, he paused for thought for a few moments. Then he spoke, to articulate a sentiment that without a doubt, would have had Jack Layton beaming proudly: "Maybe I'll join the NDP."
Over the years, he has shown some interest in politics and the key players. Like so many of us, he enjoyed Jack's sunny disposition, his honest and hardworking nature and even the feistiness that emerged during leaders' debates and at other times.
The public viewing was a historical moment, and he knew that and wanted to be part of it. Moreover, he wanted to thank Jack for his work and his fight for families.
And so we did, waiting an hour and a half in line outside until we finally entered the foyer of the House of Commons. He was intrigued to see the place where so much of the work of Canada's politicians is done. In the condolence book, I watched as he very carefully printed, without any coaching, "Thank you Jack, for your amazing work as the leader of the NDP."
As we approached the casket, and bowed our heads to say goodbye to someone we'd never met, but admired, I saw his eyes moisten with sadness. It seemed the realization of life's fragility had dawned on him, for the first time. He has never experienced the death of a loved one or attended a public viewing or funeral service. This was an important moment for many reasons, and I was glad we had come.
As for the lengthy wait in line, we spent the time just chatting. I loved the quality time. And then the questions came: he wanted to know how party candidates were chosen and how they came to represent their constituents, and how members could rise to the top to represent their parties. I tried to explain all of this, but I don't know how well I did.
Absorbing it all, he paused for thought for a few moments. Then he spoke, to articulate a sentiment that without a doubt, would have had Jack Layton beaming proudly: "Maybe I'll join the NDP."
Ottawa Parenting Times fall issue out now!
In case you haven't heard, the fall edition of Ottawa Parenting Times is out now. Look for it in your Ottawa Citizen, at local community centres and other family venues or check out the digital edition at ottawaparentingtimes.ca.
With plenty of handy back-to-school tips, good reads and regular features such as Grandparents Connection and Just for Moms, as well as the most glorious spots to bring the fam to view fall foliage, you won't want to miss our fourth issue.
Comments, questions or suggestions? I'm reachable at editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca or on Twitter: @kelly_roesler.
With plenty of handy back-to-school tips, good reads and regular features such as Grandparents Connection and Just for Moms, as well as the most glorious spots to bring the fam to view fall foliage, you won't want to miss our fourth issue.
Comments, questions or suggestions? I'm reachable at editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca or on Twitter: @kelly_roesler.
A long summer break
After a much-needed, extended summer break, And Baby Makes Three is back. I'll be sharing more colourful anecdotes from my crazy-busy life as mom of a nine-month-old, nine-year-old, and now, 13-year-old. Please be sure to stop by regularly, and I'd love to hear your funny and poignant parenting stories: editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Mother's Day photo shoot with the fam
These were taken on Mother's Day 2011 by the very talented Dimitri of Alpha Studio. Check out alphastudio.ca to see more of his work.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Why "16 & Pregnant" and "Teen Mom" are must-see family TV
Have you seen either of these MTV hit shows? If not, you really should. And so should your preteen/teenage children.
"16 & Pregnant," is an hour-long documentary series focusing on teen pregnancy. Each episode follows a five to seven-month period in the life of a teenager as she navigates the bumpy terrain of adolescence, growing pains, rebellion, and coming of age; all while dealing with being pregnant.
The spinoff, "Teen Mom," follows four of the featured "16 & Pregnant" moms in the year or so after giving birth and how they cope with the relentless demands of parenthood, school work and their relationships. It's absolutely compelling TV, with plenty of drama and heartfelt moments. But it's important viewing as well, for parents of all ages.
The launch of these shows has been met with much controversy and debate, with some claiming they "glamorize" teen pregnancy, and are in fact encouraging many girls to run out and get pregnant in hopes of landing a spot on the series, and eventual fame and fortune. On the flip side, there are some stats that are said to support the claim that the rate of teen pregnancy in the U.S. is declining in light of the immense popularity of the shows.
I can't speak to what tangible impact these shows are having on the rate of teen pregnancies in the countries in which they air, but I can tell you one thing: if you've watched even one episode of either series, you can plainly see there is nothing glamorous about these girls' lives and about teen pregnancy in general. Often, these are sad and painful stories that are hard to watch; in some cases, tinged with hope, but for many, filled with despair and hardship as these girls, faced with incredibly adult decisions, are forced to sacrifice their teenage years, their high school experiences and their relationships.
More often than not, the teen dads prove irresponsible and eventually absent (if not abusive). And it's devastating to watch, as happens in too many cases, the family dreams of a pregnant teen mom quickly dissipate amid the birth of her baby and the harsh realities of life caring for a newborn, almost always as a single parent, set in. There's no sugar-coating or glamour to be found here, as viewers watch the teen moms face marriage, divorce, adoption, religion, gossip, finances, rumours among the community, graduating high school (or not), and getting (or losing) a job. Some find trouble with the law, some struggle with eating disorders and other mental health issues, some turn to drugs and alcohol and partying, and some eventually relinquish custody of their children. I have no doubt these stories are a reasonably accurate reflection of the majority of teen pregnancies: it's brutally hard, it changes life radically, and there is a great deal of pain and sadness that comes with having a child as a teenager.
As a teen mom myself, (my first child was born when I was 18) I truly wish I would have had this fascinating glimpse into the real lives of teenage parents when I first became sexually active. There's certainly room for debate about the editing of the show, and the consequences that the money and exposure inevitably has for the moms who star in the show, but I remain convinced this reality series is extremely beneficial as a cautionary tale about the consequences of unprotected sex for teens everywhere. It airs Tuesdays at 10 p.m. on MTV Canada.
What do you think about "16 & Pregnant" and "Teen Mom"? Are these shows helpful or harmful when it comes to educating about teen pregnancy? editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca
"16 & Pregnant," is an hour-long documentary series focusing on teen pregnancy. Each episode follows a five to seven-month period in the life of a teenager as she navigates the bumpy terrain of adolescence, growing pains, rebellion, and coming of age; all while dealing with being pregnant.
The spinoff, "Teen Mom," follows four of the featured "16 & Pregnant" moms in the year or so after giving birth and how they cope with the relentless demands of parenthood, school work and their relationships. It's absolutely compelling TV, with plenty of drama and heartfelt moments. But it's important viewing as well, for parents of all ages.
The launch of these shows has been met with much controversy and debate, with some claiming they "glamorize" teen pregnancy, and are in fact encouraging many girls to run out and get pregnant in hopes of landing a spot on the series, and eventual fame and fortune. On the flip side, there are some stats that are said to support the claim that the rate of teen pregnancy in the U.S. is declining in light of the immense popularity of the shows.
I can't speak to what tangible impact these shows are having on the rate of teen pregnancies in the countries in which they air, but I can tell you one thing: if you've watched even one episode of either series, you can plainly see there is nothing glamorous about these girls' lives and about teen pregnancy in general. Often, these are sad and painful stories that are hard to watch; in some cases, tinged with hope, but for many, filled with despair and hardship as these girls, faced with incredibly adult decisions, are forced to sacrifice their teenage years, their high school experiences and their relationships.
More often than not, the teen dads prove irresponsible and eventually absent (if not abusive). And it's devastating to watch, as happens in too many cases, the family dreams of a pregnant teen mom quickly dissipate amid the birth of her baby and the harsh realities of life caring for a newborn, almost always as a single parent, set in. There's no sugar-coating or glamour to be found here, as viewers watch the teen moms face marriage, divorce, adoption, religion, gossip, finances, rumours among the community, graduating high school (or not), and getting (or losing) a job. Some find trouble with the law, some struggle with eating disorders and other mental health issues, some turn to drugs and alcohol and partying, and some eventually relinquish custody of their children. I have no doubt these stories are a reasonably accurate reflection of the majority of teen pregnancies: it's brutally hard, it changes life radically, and there is a great deal of pain and sadness that comes with having a child as a teenager.
As a teen mom myself, (my first child was born when I was 18) I truly wish I would have had this fascinating glimpse into the real lives of teenage parents when I first became sexually active. There's certainly room for debate about the editing of the show, and the consequences that the money and exposure inevitably has for the moms who star in the show, but I remain convinced this reality series is extremely beneficial as a cautionary tale about the consequences of unprotected sex for teens everywhere. It airs Tuesdays at 10 p.m. on MTV Canada.
What do you think about "16 & Pregnant" and "Teen Mom"? Are these shows helpful or harmful when it comes to educating about teen pregnancy? editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca
Monday, May 23, 2011
Edgy new parenting book: Go the F**k to Sleep
I stumbled across a hilarious blog post at http://www.embracethechaos.ca/ about a new offbeat parenting book by author and dad Adam Mansbach.
Mansbach has taken the bold step of naming his soon-to-be released book after the natural and very common thought that often crosses a parent's mind after several middle-of-the-night wakings, or when simply dealing with a fussy baby or toddler who doesn't feel like settling down (yes, it does--admit it): Go the F**k to Sleep.
Apparently, a PDF of the book, which poetically chronicles the "love and hate"of bedtime, has been circulating on the Internet in the weeks before the official release, and it's generating major buzz.
Here's a sample from Mansbach's book:
The cats nestle close to their kittens now.
The lambs have laid down with the sheep.
You’re cozy and warm in your bed, my dear.
Please go the f**k to sleep.
http://gotheftosleep.com/
Mansbach has taken the bold step of naming his soon-to-be released book after the natural and very common thought that often crosses a parent's mind after several middle-of-the-night wakings, or when simply dealing with a fussy baby or toddler who doesn't feel like settling down (yes, it does--admit it): Go the F**k to Sleep.
Apparently, a PDF of the book, which poetically chronicles the "love and hate"of bedtime, has been circulating on the Internet in the weeks before the official release, and it's generating major buzz.
Here's a sample from Mansbach's book:
The cats nestle close to their kittens now.
The lambs have laid down with the sheep.
You’re cozy and warm in your bed, my dear.
Please go the f**k to sleep.
http://gotheftosleep.com/
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
The election post-mortem in my household
When I stumbled out of bed this morning, after a long night of election-related duties in the newsroom, my 12-year-old immediately greeted me with a recap of the night's events: "It's a Conservative majority," he said. "I know," I mumbled.
"The NDP is the official opposition," he continued. "Yes, I know," I repeated.
And he didn't forget to include the Bloc's humiliation: "Duceppe quit." I nodded, impressed with his knowledge of the facts.
And then came the editorial: "I don't like the Conservatives," he frowned. I was curious to hear more, but frankly, it was just too early in the morning for in-depth analysis and debate. That will come soon, as I certainly plan to explore his political views, but for now, I'm quite proud that my pre-teen is engaged enough to not only pay attention to the results, but to actually form an opinion. I think it's super-cool, and bodes well.
Do you discuss politics with your children? What do you think of last night's outcome? What impact will the new majority Conservative government have on your family? Share your thoughts below or visit Ottawa Parenting Times on Facebook and Twitter: @ParentingTimes
"The NDP is the official opposition," he continued. "Yes, I know," I repeated.
And he didn't forget to include the Bloc's humiliation: "Duceppe quit." I nodded, impressed with his knowledge of the facts.
And then came the editorial: "I don't like the Conservatives," he frowned. I was curious to hear more, but frankly, it was just too early in the morning for in-depth analysis and debate. That will come soon, as I certainly plan to explore his political views, but for now, I'm quite proud that my pre-teen is engaged enough to not only pay attention to the results, but to actually form an opinion. I think it's super-cool, and bodes well.
Do you discuss politics with your children? What do you think of last night's outcome? What impact will the new majority Conservative government have on your family? Share your thoughts below or visit Ottawa Parenting Times on Facebook and Twitter: @ParentingTimes
Monday, May 2, 2011
Royal weddings, children and happily ever afters
Along with some two billion people, my nine-year-old daughter and I tuned in to watch Prince William marry Kate Middleton. As we chatted about The Dress, William's appearance, and the grandeur of the Abbey and Buckingham Palace, seemingly out of nowhere, my daughter noted that the royal couple "might not be together that long."
Startled, I asked her where that came from, adding that I (and the millions of others watching) certainly hoped the pair would see years of wedded happiness. She merely shrugged, and said "they just might not." And this coming from a little girl who doesn't even know the backstory of William's mother, having been born five years after Diana's death.
In that moment, it struck me just how much the model of--and our perceptions of--marriage and family has changed. Nothing is forever, quite often, neither is marriage and even children are picking up on that fact. And the makeup of families is ever-changing. My daughter is keenly aware that single-parent families exist, and why.
Thirty years ago, as millions watched Diana and Charles walk down the altar in their "fairy tale" wedding, many hoped and likely believed their story would play out that way. But we know better now, and so it seems, do our children.
Still, we hope and still we long for the romance. My worries about my daughter's cynicism quickly evaporated as she impatiently waited for The Kiss. "When are they going to kiss, mom? I want to see the kiss." Some things never change.
***On another Royal note, I read a lovely op-ed from the Daily Mail Online written by Diana's friend Rosa Monckton on how Diana's greatest legacy is that William married for love. She writes: "Somehow, Diana’s own unhappiness has helped to give her son both the capacity and the opportunity for great love."
As a parent, I can think of no greater gift.
Did you watch the royal wedding with your children? editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca
Startled, I asked her where that came from, adding that I (and the millions of others watching) certainly hoped the pair would see years of wedded happiness. She merely shrugged, and said "they just might not." And this coming from a little girl who doesn't even know the backstory of William's mother, having been born five years after Diana's death.
In that moment, it struck me just how much the model of--and our perceptions of--marriage and family has changed. Nothing is forever, quite often, neither is marriage and even children are picking up on that fact. And the makeup of families is ever-changing. My daughter is keenly aware that single-parent families exist, and why.
Thirty years ago, as millions watched Diana and Charles walk down the altar in their "fairy tale" wedding, many hoped and likely believed their story would play out that way. But we know better now, and so it seems, do our children.
Still, we hope and still we long for the romance. My worries about my daughter's cynicism quickly evaporated as she impatiently waited for The Kiss. "When are they going to kiss, mom? I want to see the kiss." Some things never change.
***On another Royal note, I read a lovely op-ed from the Daily Mail Online written by Diana's friend Rosa Monckton on how Diana's greatest legacy is that William married for love. She writes: "Somehow, Diana’s own unhappiness has helped to give her son both the capacity and the opportunity for great love."
As a parent, I can think of no greater gift.
Did you watch the royal wedding with your children? editor@ottawaparentingtimes.ca
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